Halloween a little late...

So, this post is like 5 weeks late, but better late than never. 

I have hesitated posting these pictures because my sister posted them all over her blog and instagram feed. But, I need this recorded for my blog book. 

Several years ago I decided that we would always try and do a family theme for our Halloween costumes. It started with our Peter Pan theme. 

Then Scott and I were farmers with our animal kids.

Last year we were cowboys and Indians. 

This year Scott was en'route to Afghanistan and of course would be wearing his uniform on Halloween. 

Separation cannot break our tradition, so the kids and I dressed up patriotically. 

Gracie was the Statue of Liberty:

 Lydia was Rosie the Rivetter:

Henry was expecially excited to be a soldier like his dad, but disappointed he was without a gun:

 Technically, this costume would make me enlisted but we are going to go ahead and say I'm dressed up like a 4-star Army General. ;) I am the commander of our house anyway. 

 I couldn't have pulled this off without my sister GentriLee. 

She took the photos and helped motivate me to do something awesome instead of curling up in my bedroom and pouting. 

Big, long, sappy rant.

I have no pictures for this post. I figure anyone who reads this also follows me on instagram or is my friend on Facebook and therefor you've already seen any pictures I would have to put here. I know this is such a "Bah-Humbug" attitude. When did blogging become so hard for me?

I am merely here to empty a few thoughts that have been swimming around in my head. They are all negative. So stop reading now!

I suppose I am just recording these thoughts for future reference. Several times I have gone back to read my blog posts from Scott's last deployment and the honesty of my feelings and trials have helped me a lot this go'round. Inevitably, we will be doing this again. (Hopefully while we are stationed in a nice place that I enjoy and feel safe to live husbandless) So, to my future, single-military-wife self:

*Suddenly, every good husband doing good husbandly things (sweeping the garage, taking a crying baby from his wives arms, hanging Christmas lights, picking up his kid from preschool, etc...) all make my heart go pitter-patter. Don't read into this the wrong way. I'm not romantically swooning over every man I see. It's just that I've become hyper-sensitive to the little things that I'm missing. My spouse is a good one. One who does all those good husbandly things and more. I now realize how attractive that is in a man. For example, several days ago I was picking Henry up from a friends house. When I pulled up to the house, said friends father was tinkering away in their garage. He then came out and greeted me as he walked me to the door and just inside their home the little baby (about a week older than Will) was hanging out on the floor and the father picked him up and began playing with his baby boy. My heart swelled up. My eyes swelled up. It was all I could do to keep the flood gates closed before Henry and I got to the car and I could release and weep. Poor Henry just asks, "Mom, are you hurt or just feeling sad again?"

*Why are there so many Christmas songs about loved ones being away? I know I'm spoiled and have never had to deal with this particular trial before which is why I've never picked up on the multitude of sad Christmas songs. One in particular that I've heard multiple times is Merry Christmas, Darling by The Carpenters. Sheesh. I sob every time.

*Babies are hard. My little Will is stinkin' cute, but man he is high maintenance. I was really wanting to go to a super fun Christmas party tomorrow night. A pretty exclusive party for cool people in Utah. It was only a possibility because my sister is a cool and popular blogger and she RSVP'd +1 for me. It was so thoughtful and kind of her to invite me along and I thought I could make it work until tonight. As Will screamed for the last 2 of his waking hours I realized I had been reaching for a dream. That sounds a bit dramatic, and it is, but I could really use a night out with fun and inspiring adults. I thought for a few minutes about buying some formula and just wishing my mom luck with Will for the night. That's not fair to her, she already does so much for my kids and I. Plus, I've been in this boat before and once I start formula, the convenience factor is just too great and before I know it my milk is dry and I can't nurse anymore. I really, really want to nurse Will for a full year, at least. I do love it - most of the time. I just have to remember that having a baby takes a year of your life. For real. The entire first year is about baby and not you and that is okay. It's just hard sometimes. I miss being able to easily (and without guilt) pass the baby responsibility over to my husband.

And that, my friends, is a big, long, sappy rant.

Several weeks ago we took advantage of some gorgeous weather to walk a few blocks to this horse.

We cut up some apples and carrots to give him a treat. 

He is a super sweet horse and was especially friendly after his treats. 

 William seemed underwhelmed by the event. 

Playing and Picking Pumpkins

During fall break from school we went to the Red Barn in Santaquin to pick out pumpkins. 

Thank heaven for my sister Gentri Lee and her photography skills (both taking and editing photos)

Sadly, I am absolutely UN-talented when it comes to taking pictures. I could be using the same camera as the top notch photographers, but my photos would still look awful. 

Here are a few favorites from our outing:

I think they nailed the theme here:

 Running through the maze:

 Gentri told Henry she was going to take a picture of him posing on the truck and he struck his best:

Lydia was disappointed that the rule was she had to be able to carry the pumpkin herself to take it home:

 Will was not a fan of the patch. It was colder than I anticipated and I felt bad that he may have been cold but this face is the perfect expression of how he felt the entire time:

 I was a hot mess trying to keep Will, his blanket and my purse all together and not covered in dirt. Will was being defiant and did not like the sling. (not sure why, he is usually a big fan)

It took Henry quite a while to find his pumpkin. He kept walking and searching and saying, "I just don't think any of the pumpkins here are right for me." But, alas, he did find the one!

If you like big words...

And extremely well written and drawn out thoughts on things like 

deployment to Afghanistan and trips to Alaska...

 then you should read my husbands blog!

scottadamsjag.blogspot.com

He's cute, isn't he?

It's only been two weeks but it feels like more. 

I miss him and his big words. 

And his stories. 

And the joke of the day. 

And arguing about which documentary to watch on Netflix. 

I say I get an "E" for effort

Today was a day that I should've just stayed home. 

(Ever sine I had Will I've always felt like that but today was especially insane)

I'm just going to break down the one hour we attempted to being church goers today:

As we were walking out the door (only 5 minutes late - that is good for us since Will was born) Gracie and Lydia were fighting about shoes. Gracie wanted to wear her new black shoes but they didn't match her dress so I told her to wear the boots and Lydia to wear the black shoes. This made Gracie really angry. I managed to coax her into the car but when we arrived at church she refused to get out of the car and so I left her there to throw her tantrum. 

Lydia was already waiting at the church doors and I was getting Will out of the car seat when I see Henry run through the line of cars parked in front of us and out into the parking lot isle as a Ford Explorer (with extra big and lifted wheels) comes cruisin' through. I scream to Henry and the Explorer comes to a screeching hault just inches away from my little boy. Shocked Henry turns and runs back to me as my heart is racing and I'm still trying to wrap my head around what just happened. I could've sworn Henry had gotten hit, from my perception, he should have been hit, but he didn't fall to the ground. As I replay the scene in my mind I can only envision Angels surrounding and protecting his little body. I wrapped Henry in my arms and we both sobbed for a minute and clung to each other grateful that he was unharmed.

After we pulled ourselves together we safely walked inside and found a place at the back of the chapel. 

In the first 10 minutes of us sitting William managed to spit up four times. Soaking my shirt, jacket and skirt and soaking himself. I thought, "If I can just make it through the next 40 minutes of Sacrament meeting I can take the kids to primary and run home to change us both". 20 minutes later Will is inconsolable and noisy so I take Henry with me and Will into the hall (because I don't trust him enough to leave him without my supervision).

I decide this is a good time to go check on Gracie and she is happily playing with my lipstick. I tell her it's time to suck it up, put on the boots and come inside. She agrees but as soon as we are sitting she takes her boots off and refuses to put them back on. So, I get frustrated and send her home to change her shoes. (We are living just around the corner from our church building in a quiet neighborhood. Just for a little clarity - I'm not sending her out alone in a big city)

Finally, Will surrenders and falls asleep in my arms just as I notice poop dripping from his onsie and onto my outfit. Nice. At this time Lydia decides to claim she doesn't feel well and refuses to go to primary. By this point I have lots all strength at keeping up our church attending ways and we all go home to watch cartoons. 

And here I am writing it all out so that someday I can look back and laugh at how rediculous my life can be sometimes. And even  as ornery as I am about today I know that sometime in the future I will miss this phase of my life. The grass is always greener...

The anticipation of our separation.

 Scott made me promise that I would blog while he is deployed. 

I hesitantly agreed. 

Scott left us two days ago but we were able to have a few weeks of fun, family playtime. 

Here is a rundown of what we've been doing: 

This was the night before he left. We had a picnic at my favorite park up on the mountain with an amazing view. It was perfect weather for a while then turned freeing and started to rain. This was the picture we managed to get before we all ran into the car. 

Just after we got to Utah

 we went up to one of my favorite places in the whole world, the cabin. 

It was Will's first trip up there and for the most part, he loved it. He loves being outside. 

My Lydia is getting so beautiful!

My papoose. 

Henry liked hanging out in the hammock. 

Gracie was excited for the fire roasted hot dogs. 

Scott ran the Logan (Top of Utah) marathon with his brother, Randall and they both scored a sweet trophy for finishing first in their age division. 

We were able to bless Will with both our families present and it was a very sweet and emotional experience. 

He is such a cutie tootie! 

The kids all started school here in Alpine and we were able to (sort of) get them started on a normal schedule. Scott and I were able to spend a lot of time shopping and what-not while Henry was at preschool. 

As much as I tried to defy time and the universe, the day of our parting came. We tried to relax, ate out at our favorite places and a bit of fun at Jump On It. 

Our parting at the airport was a bit dramatic. I was surprised at how emotional the kids got. Of course, that made Scott and I more emotional as well. Scott got mad at me for taking pictures, but I'm glad I snuck in a few:

*8 months. *31 weeks. *217 days. *5,208 hours. 

Will's birth story

I haven't really been a blogger lately, but I do want to record the story of my little Will's birth so I shall do it here so it can be included in our family history.

William was due on May 28 (or 29, depending on who you talked to, not that it matters). My last two babies came 2 and 3 weeks early so naturally, I assumed he would be coming early as well. Silly me. My parents had planned on him being early as well and when his due date came and went I was feeling the pressure. I needed to utilize the help my parents could provide while they were here and how upsetting for them to go home without seeing their grand-baby! So, I was induced on May 30. It was such a hard decision for me to make and I felt so sad and so defeated. I had prepared this entire pregnancy to labor and deliver naturally and without drugs or intervention. I prayed and prayed that Heavenly Father would get things started and bring Will out on his own, but it didn't work out that way.
The hospital called early on the morning of the 30th and asked if we could arrive by 7:30. I was so nervous and emotional. I thought we would be leaving a quiet home but everyone woke up and we all ate breakfast together. It was nice.
My mom and Scott both came to be with me for the delivery. By the time we got into our room and signed the million waivers and such it was 10:00. My midwife came in and hooked up the pitocin around 10:30 and broke my water at 10:45. I could not believe how much water came out when she broke it. It literally sounded like a full flowing river for at least a full minute. Usually they increase the amount of pitocin from the IV every 15 minutes to get things going, but as I wanted my body to react as naturally as possible I requested that the nurse only increase it every half hour.  I slowly started contracting irregularly. By about 12:30 I was contracting regularly. For the entire labor the pitocin drip only when up to 10 ml which they usually go up to 36 ml for a normal induction, I think.
By 1:00 I was in active labor and in "the zone". My mom sat and brushed my hair while Scott would let me squeeze his hand during the contractions. Up until then I had been doing some squatting and exercises to really work with my contractions, but by about 1:30 they were strong enough that all I could do was breathe and endure them. Around 2:30 I could tell that my contractions were not making much progress any more. I stood up and leaned over hanging onto Scott's arms for one and it was SO much more painful that I knew I should change my position, but the contractions were so much more manageable while sitting on my ball that I chickened out and sat back down. My midwife came in to check me at 3:00 and I was dialated to 7 cm but  William's head was posterior so she had me lay on my side and man those contractions got SO intense. I remember moaning and yelling through each contraction and thinking how crazy and weird I must seem. It felt like I was screaming, but my mom and Scott swear I wasn't and that I looked quite controlled. After about 15 minutes she had me move and lay on my other side and within minutes I was completely dialated. I thought for sure once I reached this point he would just slide right out of me, I mean, he is baby number four!  But no, it took what seemed like an eternity from this point to the end. As I was laying on my side still I was doing involuntary pushes through the contractions which actually was SUCH a relief. When my midwife could see his head she had me lay on my back and I started really pushing through the contractions. It felt like he crowned pretty quickly and then stalled. I think it was only about 3 minutes where he was stretching that last lip of skin to come out but the pain made it feel like hours. Scott makes fun of me that the best moment of the labor was the moment was when I yelled, "Just pull him out of me!" Finally, the relief of his head passing through came and a small push later to get his shoulders out and I was free...sort of.
I was exhausted and everything was still throbbing as they whisked him away from me. He was very limp when he first came out and they wouldn't put him on my chest or wait to clamp the umbilical cord because of it. While the baby team worked on William my midwife assessed the damage and said I had four small tears. Ack!! Dang it! I just knew if I could deliver unmedicated I would avoid this problem. Of course I could totally feel one of the tears happening when he was coming out though. Oh man, having to be sewn up without the epidural was a nightmare. Between the stitching  and her having to keep scrubbing it all down with gauze to get the blood out of the way I was so annoyed and miserable.
Meanwhile, Will's first apgar score was only a 4 (hence why I couldn't hold him), but by the time his 5 minute apgar came around he scored a 9. Finally I was able to hold my sweet baby boy.
My biggest disappointment with delivering naturally was that I was not feeling strong and on top of the world afterward. I had heard, and hoped, that you feel great, walk around and such after but I felt just as loopy, weak and awkward after as I had after my epidural wore off with my other kids.
Now that I've just complained and described the most painful and intense few hours of my life I'm going to shock everyone and say that I'm 90% sure I would deliver naturally again if I were to have another baby. I can't really give a good reason why except that I feel an extremely strong connection to William. Like we were a team and we went through that crazy experience together. Birth must be an excruciating experience for those babies too and a small part of me feels like maybe with the epidural I've abandoned my other babies in that process and was pain free while they still had to endure it. I know it sounds silly but there it is.

Now, enjoy a few pictures of my sweet, sweet baby Will.

Right after delivery:

Next day hospital visit with a proud big sister:

Four days old:

 Henry getting to know his baby brother:

 Lydia is by far most obsessed with Will. She asks to hold him all day long:

 I am totally smitten:

A few favorites to start with:

 Alright, alright already! 

I keep getting threats from people about my blog. 

So fine, here is a post of a few of my favorite pictures from our time in Florida. 

Maybe I'll be dedicated enough to post again tomorrow...

I really think the people in this picture make it special. I mean, it just wouldn't be the same without them:

Our first morning in Florida the sunrise took my breath away. 

 We spent some time  in Downtown Disney and by far our favorite part was this wacky mirror in a candy shoppe:

 We went on the safari ride in the Animal Kingdom first thing in the morning and it sure paid off! 

These giraffes were so close and we saw two crocodiles get in a fight. 

I took this of myself while waiting for the rest of the crew to ride Thunder Mountain. 

I call it, "Experience of a Pregnant Lady at Disney Land". 

Though this is not the full experience, if I could capture the shredding pains in my lower stomach from walking so much in a picture, I would add it to the collection. 

 Scott refused to pay to rent a stroller and his body paid for it dearly. Though my two boys look pretty cute like this:

 On our "non-Disney" day we still needed to fill it with something exciting so we went to this awesome ice cream parlor and ordered the Kitchen Sink. 8 scoops of ice cream, all the toppings in the house (which included donuts, brownies, chocolate chips, oreos, cherries, sprinkles, and more I can't even remember), and an entire can of whipped cream. Then, they turn down the lights and have a disco ball and music as they bring it out to your table. Just to make sure you know how awesome you are for ordering this. 

  

It was delicious, exciting and exhausting all at the same time. 

I had a stomach ache the rest of the night, but it was so worth it! 

 Waiting for our table at Les Chefs de France in Epcot. Lydia refused to look happy until her belly was full. 

We were so surprised to meet Remy while we dined! He came to ask about our food and make sure everything was okay. The kids were ecstatic to hear that he was preparing our meal. 

Remy sure is a great chef. This was by far the best food we ate our entire trip! 

What we've been doing ... with pictures

Here is a picture tour of what the Adams family has been doing the past couple of months.

We are having a baby in May. Here is how we almost announced it to everyone-

That's right; we're having another boy. We're still open to any name suggestions.

We are still getting used Atlanta, but it has been a rather pleasant fall/winter ... if you can call 

60 degrees winter.

Henry got a nasty cold that required a trip to the hospital, but all is well now.

 Lydia had a birthday. We can't believe she is seven years old. Her greatest desire was to eat dinner at Texas Road House and sit in the saddle.

But she still loves her babies, and that helps to reassure us she is still a little girl.

Henry and his Dad have been super heroes around the house constantly. 

We had a great Christmas with three spoiled children.

Lydia took a trip to the Georgia Aquarium and ever since, she has told everyone she will be a dolphin trainer when she grows up.

Her favorite was the Beluga whale. 

We had an interesting cultural experience when attending Catholic Mass with Scott's friend from work. Next week, Scott's friend will attend our Church.

We let the kids bang some pots and pans on New Years (at 9:00 p.m.). Who knew these were so fragile? 

We joined Scott for lunch at the CNN Center, across the street from Scott's work. While eating lunch we had a cameraman asked us a question and a friend later said she saw us on television that night.

We finally got the pictures finished from our trip to Utah last September. Here are some highlights.

Scott's favorite-

My favorite-